32 wks, or 8 mos., for those who can't count

I am pretty sure this post is going to be another hodge-podge of thoughts because lately, that describes how my days are. I used to be a planner who would make a list of tasks to be done that day and I'd stick to it. But I think those days have curled up in the corner and died. Mostly because I am easily distracted....and partly because when I'm NOT distracted, I have to readjust the day's plans according to my back problems.

Since I mentioned the BPs, I'll start with that update.

Basically....the pain is still rampant and unruly every day...usually kicks in around noon, sometimes 1. If I stay lying down later in the morning and work from bed on my laptop, I can get the pain to not be too horrible until 3.

I have been going to another chiropractor that specializes in active release treatment at the urging of my ob/gyn. (The chiro has been working with the KC Chiefs for the past 16 years so I know he has to at least know his shiot. haha)  He is breaking down my scar tissue via intense pressure and simultaneous stretching. I don't mind the pain of his "work out" because I feel that it's healing in some way. But since the burning, throbbing pain in my middle left back (I'm actually thinking the pain is between my ribs in the back) has not been much affected by the above treatment, I am seeking out one last desperate attempt to relieve what surely will be even more pain these last 8-9 weeks. On WEdnesday, I'm seeing a pain management specialist regarding a possible cortisone/steroid injection. My ob/gyn has approved of it...and now it's just a matter of whether this pain doc will stick a needle in my back when he can't take an xray due to the fetal culprit that is cuddling my innards.

So when people ask me how I'm doing, I tend to be honest and tell them...for the most part, I'm okay, but the pain is a large cumulus cloud of blackness on my days and nights....and it only gets gloomier when I think about the possibility of it not going away when the baby is out.

Moving on though because there really are lots of other updates for those who care. And I'm sick of crying about it. (Though I do want to thank the few friends whom I've sought comfort in ... and my mom and my husband...for enduring the bulk of the tearful complaints...)


Here is our most recent belly pic...32 weeks marks the time when you're supposed to pack your overnight bag. I haven't gotten to that yet, but I did just get two pairs of pajamas and new underwear from Victoria's Secret that I plan on taking. So what more do I need? haha ;)

Two weeks ago, I had an ultrasound and it was the first one that I actually teared up and felt the tears inside, too. Because the lil' sucker YAWNED!! And he clearly sleeps like his daddy does--with his hand up by his cheek. (Seriously, I always tell Neil he looks cherubic in nature when he's going to bed because he props up his cheek with the back of his hands...something I could never do because I would sweat and then break out...why is Neil so lucky?? haha)

Despite the fact I feel like I have swallowed a beach ball and all of my other organs have been squished into oblivion...somehow, he has managed to still move and groove from within. He's been moving SO MUCH. I will feel gas-like pains when I'm lying back and no, it's not really gas...I look down and see a protuberance through my belly that creeps us (Neil and me) out. (See last blog post for an example) but now it is even more frequent...a few times a night. I really wish there were an invention on the market for preggos to use at home that would tell us what body party is where. Yes, like an ultrasound, but something that isn't that expensive or cumbersome. As of the last ultrasound, he was in the 65th percentile for current estimated weight of 3.2 lbs. I wouldn't mind if he stays in that percentile for weight.

Dub played shuffleboard in my belly the other night. I cheered him on, silently. (Please note that I have a mild linea nigra going on and that too is not straight, much like my spine. ha...I don't have anything that is symmetrical on my body)

We have had two showers...and both went so well. Here are some photos of the decor from the Kansas City one. I'd love to show you ones from the Omaha one, but I don't have them yet. (Ahem, Lara!! ;) ) So these will have to do. This KC one was put on by my pals Cara, Gina and Ashley...and they really outdid themselves. The theme was Wild Wild West....and I had a great time and got some good stuff!! I cried maybe 11 times that day and my friends were all such dears about it... because I've hit the most emotional part of the pregnancy for me. Sometimes I will have flashes of ultimate bliss....they are fleeting, but they are still wonderful...where I am so excited and happy that I couldn't ask for more (these usually occur during the morning hours before any pain is here) and then other times I get really sappy or sad or anxious. My emotions should team up and build an amusement park. They would have the craziest roller-coaster known to (wo)man.

Ending that blab fest and on to the pics:

Darling, no?

At the Omaha shower from my friend Christina, and then again today when I went to visit one of my pals, Leigh, we have been given boxes of baby boy clothes. We are stocked to the max with newborn to 6-9 months with onesies and comfy attire . So we do not need any other clothes (hint, hint to anyone wanting to get us something...as fun as it is to buy clothes for babies, we really don't need them....but thank you. haha)

Here is one laundry basket of newly washed goods...this is just one load of laundry we did that day...for JUST the clothes for 0-3 months!!! And this is before I got clothes from Leigh today!

Last weekend, we stayed in KC for Thanksgiving and did something really mellow (and something that will surely be repeated...): we went to Bristol for their buffet. No cooking. No cleaning. And as I keep saying, the only bad thing was: no leftovers. But being here enabled us to get lots done. The Friday was dedicated to nesting and getting the baby room ready to be decorated. I will post pics when it's all together...featuring an awesome abacus made by my dad and brother.

Oh, that reminds me.... I have been warned that cats like to crawl into baby stuff cuz if objects make noise, are soft or are forbidden, they are all the more intrigued. We haven't had a rough time with anything thus far. But Kramer couldn't be found one day last week and I finally gave up and was returning to my office when I looked into the baby room and saw....THIS. Sigh. How can you not love cats??? totally conked out on the changing pad. hahahahah

I am in the process of researching labor & delivery processes. Because other than what I see on TLC's THE BABY STORY, I'm kinda clueless as to what to expect and what my options are. I know I have a doctor whose mantra with C-secs and inductions are in line with mine (not opting for them unless medically necessary) so I don't need to go down the midwife/doula path as I feel very comfortable with the nursing staff at Shawnee Mission and my doc and the rest of her counterparts should one of them end up delivering lil' Dub. But do I want a hot tub before the epidural? Do I want a saline lock or an IV? Do I want to do intermittent fetal monitoring or constant? And so forth. So many things to consider. Neil and I have our 8 hour labor & delivery class this Saturday so am sorta looking forward to that..... I don't need a novel-sized birth plan, but I would like to be educated when I see what they are doing and if there is anything in the process I don't agree with now, I'd like to be able to tell them why and know my options. And educate Neil in case I can't speak for myself. Such a scary thought!!

I said scary...so that reminds me. I had TWO vivid, freaky dreams last night. The first was that Neil and I were upstairs (in a house that wasn't really this house we live in, but it was our house in the dream, you know how that goes) when we heard someone trying to get in the front door. Neil, somewhat uncharacteristically, might I add, went straight down the steps to check it out and I followed with a bowl (yes, because if you're ever attacked, offer to have the assailant hang tight so you can ladle in some soup). When I got to the bottom of the stairs, Neil was shutting the door and had some junkmail in his hand. He shrugged and said, "Just the mailman." I wasn't buying it. So I peeked through the peephole and saw a man in a postal carrier outfit, but with a crew cut and a sinister look in his eye, his back mostly to me, but he was eyeing the door and my heart stopped because I just KNEW he was a hired assassin. I whispered, and this, mind you, is what woke me up ... because I whispered it out loud in real life..."That is no postman!!!!"

Then I was wide awake and freaked out and dripping hot sweat. That was at 2:30 a.m. and I didn't go back to sleep for 3 hours. The next time I awoke, Dub had been moving lots in my stomach and I combined that with my dream and in real life I rubbed my belly and in my dream, his hand reached out fully and grabbed mine. I woke up with a start and a small shriek. Kramer was the only one to hear me though as Neil had left for work. Wowzers. Let the madness in slumber begin, no? I think maybe Neil and I should stop watching AMERICAN HORROR STORY. haha NAhhh, just kidding...Dylan McDermott is too hot to give up on that show.

The highlight of the week was perhaps having maternity photos taken with Leigh Miller. Some people wonder why you should bother with such photos, but I will tell you... it's a wonderful way to send off the "family" you've been with just your husband...to document the expectations in a loving way...and to capture what you looked like when you were growing a human. Oftentimes, I look at photography (as a photographer, but also as a person) and ask myself...do I wish that my parents had these images of themselves (or us kids, etc)? And if the answer is yes, I say SIGN ME UP! If I end up with a kid who is not sentimental in the least and never wants to look back at what he looked like while in me... then let's just say I'll cross my fingers I get a girl next. hahaha

See, this was just a teaser from Leigh. And I love it so. It's warm. It's loving. It's Neil and me, with the pop of Dub down in the left corner.

So is that enough of an update for now? I'm sorta spent. And it's taken forever to write this because my roll was interrupted by a spider that dropped down onto the couch that I lie back on for 65 percent of the day... so now I don't know if I can lie there again without feeling the critter jitters. My point, that totally ruined my groove and now, 3 hours later, I'm finally done. So off to go groan and moan as I try to get comfy on my memory-foam wedge of a pillow in bed next to a husband who has been wonderful lately. :)