Holy wow. Christmas came and went! It was so wonderful to spend it with my family. And so weird, to look around, to really take it in, knowing the dynamic will be changing in just a short amount of time. Yes, it will be changing for the better (or so they tell me, haha)....but it's still bittersweet. I cried every time I hugged someone goodbye because the next time I see my mom and dad, my sister & her hubby, my niece, my brother and his wife.....we're GOING TO HAVE A BABY. Good golly.
Is anyone else freaking out?
I'm physically so uncomfy, and it surely will just get worse. I cringe to think of the achey, sleepless, too-stretched nights that lie ahead. And if I make it out of the StretchMark Forest unscathed, I will be shocked, though I admit, I'm not really doing anything other than some lotioning or using Burt's Bee's Wax belly polish or whatever the heck it's called. Maybe I remember to do it once a week.
Here is a video from two nights ago. I guess now that he is over 6 lbs (allegedly), he has less room inside and kicks etc. feel more like sliding movements. Here is proof of what it looks like.....the 13 second point and then again at 42 seconds is where the significant action is. If this video looks pixelated, go to this link because it really is necessary to see it as clearly as possible. http://youtu.be/xbvXQ_eP3tc
I cried tonight because I was talking about longing to sit in a padded bath tub and have the water be 110 degrees AT LEAST. Neil said to hang in there, I can do that in a month (well, it won't be padded. haha)
I then got all sappy because things like that make me wish for Dub to just COME ALREADY. and then that makes me freak out because I should wish this time away...this down time...the calm before the storm...these precious hours that are left to just do what I want to do (well, within reason as my back and discomfort are quite limiting.) So I am trying to be patient and a trooper.
I am very much looking forward to tomorrow, too. One of my best friends is coming down from Omaha just to spend time with me. She's my go-to silly friend....and it will be a good break. At first I was feeling guilty for taking off 2 days of work but then I realized that as a business owner, I am getting robbed of a true maternity leave since I can't afford to be hands off the biz for longer than 2-3 weeks, so the least I can do is take advantage of the perk of flexibility that ALSO comes with owning my own business. So I'm having an Audrey Vacation. :) Hoping she can distract me, lift my spirits and just make me feel a bit like the old me again.
And have I mentioned that Neil has been amazing this trimester? He is a constant source of support for me. His emails during the day make me smile. He is goofy...he is understanding. I am so thankful that he "gets it"....it might have taken awhile, but he gradually realized exactly how traumatic pregnancy can be on the human body. MY body. And my heart. And my brain. And my will. haha
Alrighty.... to close, here is our 36 week maternity pic. It's not really a good one in terms of showing the belly, so I also put in a bare belly pic at the end because when I'm clothed, and wearing white...on beige, I don't think I look as big as I feel...or am. haha
I'm not sticking out a bunch more, but I'm fuller on the sides and up top and bottom. He's supposedly the size of a bowling ball now.
This is the part where time slows down again, too, which really sucks. Or at least it did for me. It seemed to crawl to that end point. I wish I could tell you how to prepare for the "after" but I'm still in disbelief that I'm a mother so I don't really have any great advice. haha
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